You're O U T !

You’re   O u t !

Glaring personal traits can lead to a person being prejudged. Glaring trait is in the eye of the beholder. Martin Shopka had three strikes against him. He was a man, he had a beard and he smoked heavily. In Jill’s eyes, he was no better than her father, a man she learned to fear.

As in baseball, a strike one call isn’t serious. Martin’s first fault is that he is a man. Because of Jill’s father’s violent alcoholic nature and Dave’s indiscretion, Jill knew men could not be trusted. Yes, Jill was married, but she often didn’t trust Joseph completely. Later in her marriage she frequently disapproved of some of his actions.

Strike two! More serious! Martin’s second fault is he had a beard, a scraggly beard. Jill’s father had a beard. Any man with a beard fell under suspicion. Even in a half conscious state when Jill saw the doctor in the hospital bending over her, she became very anxious. Having two strikes against you doesn’t mean that Jill would avoid the person. Ben, a boy who tried to win her heart, succeed many times in dating her. But as a marital partner he was out of luck. His second flaw––he was a social drinker. It never happened in her presence, but the grape vine stories disqualified him.

Strike three! You’re out of luck! Jill will not accept Martin. His fatal third flaw? He was a smoker, a chain smoker. Yellow stained fingers testified to an entrenched addiction. His habit clung to his clothes and assaulted her nostrils. It stirred disturbing memories of her father.

YOU'RE O U T !

  

          Do those three aspects of Martin’s character make him a bad person? He did let Daniel, and Amber ride his horses. He sold Hoss to Joseph so Amber would have her own horse. One could argue in the first case Martin’s horses were exercised and in the second he received financial compensation. At Daniel’s wedding, countering negative opinions, Martin pointed to Jill’s actions to show she was a good wife. When Jill wanted to move to Camrose, Martin bought Joseph’s farm. Later when Jill was in the hospital, he asked about Jill’s health. Joseph was already divorced from Jill at the time.  

Personality conflict based on generalizations leaves one with blinders. They’re rendered a person incapable of appreciating another. Know of a personality trait or behavior that has blinded another person so they can’t see any good in another person?

In Baggage burdens Kathy, Jill’s sister, was raised by the same parents.  While they had similar childhood experiences, Kathy turned out very different from her sister. Why? That’s the next blog.