Good Camouflaged

Good Camouflaged

A Lesson

Why search for the good in people? In Genesis 1:3 & 4 we read God said “Let there be light,” and there was light. God saw that the light was good . . .” In Genesis 1:11 & 12 we read God said, “Let the land produce vegetation: . . . And God saw that it was good. Jumping to Genesis 1:27 & 31 we read So God created man in his own image . . . God saw all that he had made and it was very good.

The will of God is to create things that are good. Man, male and female, are made in the image of God and thus have the capacity to do good things. Seeing good actions done by man may be considered as God acting through his creation. Given that man, male and female, are God’s image bearers and are seen by God as very good, it is reasonable to expect that man would do at least some good deeds. Therefore those image bearers should be treated with the utmost care, even those who do only a little good. Is this an impossible lesson to live up to?

In Baggage Burdens. a reader may find some characters are not very nice, not good. In deed some characters in the novel see other characters as bad, even evil. Jill sees her father, Frank, as evil. And Gertrude is not much better. As a reader you may well conclude that Jill’s actions often make her look bad. She herself doesn’t see herself a good, as worthy of receiving love. In the light of “A Lesson” above would you agree that such people are good, worthy of patience and hope?

Jill’s strong dislike for Frank is understandable after one reads how violent Frank is when he comes home drunk. Yet Kathy, Jill’s sister, experienced beatings too. However Kathy changes her mind about her father. Alice, Jill’s mother, not only tolerated Frank’s blistering behavior, but also still loved him. What good could possibly be seen in Frank?

In the early stages of Baggage Burdens., readers may find Jill an unlikeable person. They may wonder how can a writer dare to make such a person the protagonist.

Jill runs away from home leaving her mother must face Frank alone. Earlier Jill despised her sister for running away. Jill runs away from her grandmother who helps Jill survive. Jill uses Joseph, her husband, and manipulates him. Can you find any good in Jill to motivate you to pull for her to find a better life?

Think of a couple of individuals you find difficult. What redeeming quality do they have that does or may enable you to associate with them?

Nothing succeeds like success. Does this kernel of wisdom work? In Baggage Burdens. it is used as a motive for characters to continue to struggle. The next blog explores the nourishing spirit of this seed.

Love the Farmer's Market

Love the Farmer’s Market

For consumers the Farmer’s Market is a place to purchase local vegetables or specialty foods. Some people look forward to discovering irresistible crafts that might add a touch of beauty to their homes.

In Baggage Burdens. for Joseph and Thomas, the market is an important part of their life. They sell their vegetables to support their family.  While they aren’t becoming rich, it is a satisfying part of their life.

Other market rewards is an opportunity to display and talk about their hobby as seen through various crafts. Friendships form. Joseph rescues a 63-year-old seller who has a flat tire. While Susan can’t convince Joseph to take any money for his help, she does give a necklace with a Black Beauty pendant to Amber, Joseph’s daughter. When Joseph debates moving into Camrose, he's disappointed that he would be giving up visiting with his market customers. After eight years in Camrose, Joseph goes to visit Thomas at the market. A large crowd has gathered around Thomas’ table. Joseph can’t resist helping his friend and renewing old acquaintances with his former customers.

Thomas, too values the social interactions at the market more than the economic benefits. Retirement for the seventy-one year old was difficult. Mornings he needed help to unload his truck and set up, but that didn’t prevent him from coming back year after year. The bonds of friendship with his customers and other vendors were too strong. Thomas knew the life history of his regular customers and most of the vendors. When he did retire, Thomas often returned to the market so he could visit with the venders.

Thomas and Joseph reflect the vendors I have met at the market when I sell my books. The vendors know the names and interests of their fellow sellers. They too, struggle in disciplining themselves from buying too many items from the other market stalls.

Can you see the good in other people?

In Baggage Burdens. the dark side of some characters may prevent the reader from seeing their good qualities. No one is perfect. By the same token no one is all bad. In the next blog I identify some character’s hidden qualities and discuss why it is important that we can see them.

Can you see God in other people?

Quality Time with Your Children

Quality Time    

with Your Children

 Joseph embraced involvement in his children’s recreational life. Like many parents he enjoyed playing board games with his children. He set times aside to play catch with Daniel. In tune with the interests of his children Joseph began horseback riding. The rides became times when he and his children shared concerns and anticipated  dreams. For the children Joseph built a skating rink. He attended Daniel’s soccer games when they lived on the farm and Matthew’s games when they moved to Camrose. First with Daniel and later with Matthew, Joseph takes his sons to the church’s Annual Father-Son Campout. The events focused on building a father-son relationship.

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Farm life provides opportunities for children and parents to work together and appreciate each other.  Going out to cut down a Christmas tree opens the door for Joseph and Daniel to ride out in the tractor for a fun afternoon. Daniel’s hanging around Dad's workshop starts Daniel learning carpentry skills. Joseph brags to other men in the church about his son being a valued gopher. Daniel learns how to sand and later to operate a lathe. Many times Joseph and the children garden. At the Farmer’s Market, under Joseph’s watchful eye, Daniel sells the model trucks that he carved and Amber assists in packaging sold produce.

Frequent interactions leads to knowing what’s important to your children and providing unwavering support. Daniel valued his friends at the church school. Because of Joseph’s strong bond with his son he understood his son’s attachment to the rural school. Jill stood no chance in pulling Daniel to be homeschooled with his sister. Joseph’s support for his son is demonstrated again when the family moved to the city. Joseph drove Daniel to the rural school everyday. Amber’s relationship with her father leads her to understand his love for the farm. Her paintings capture that attachment. At a silent auction Joseph outbids a strong competitor for Amber’s painting.

Quality time verses quantity of time.

Which is more important?

or

Would you agree with Joseph?  Both are very important.

What story can you share to support your position?

  

Farmer’s Market: more than a market. In Baggage Burdens. Joseph shows that the Famer’s Market is more than cashing in on a harvest. The next blog shows how Joseph and I, both venders, enjoy this venue.

To Be A Very Good Parent

To Be A Very Good Parent

In Baggage Burdens. Jill’s goal was to be a very good parent, at least better than her parents were to her.  A very important thing to know is that a parent is human; a parent will make mistakes, especially first time parents. The key is to learn from those mistakes.

Jill’s first mistake was missing opportunities to be involved in activities and games with her son and her husband. It began when she didn’t join Daniel, her son, and Joseph in sleigh rides to cut down the family Christmas tree. For Jill it was too cold. She found the board games played by Daniel and Joseph too competitive. Daniel loved being Joseph’s gopher in the greenhouse. Jill worked on her correspondent courses. Joseph became “soccer mom” for Daniel. Jill stayed home.

The bond between father and son grew strong. Jill felt left out. To compensate she attempted to convince Daniel to let her home school him as she was doing for Daniel’s sister, Amber. Daniel resisted. Jill’s second mistake, she persisted in attempting to persuade Daniel to change his mind. Jill didn’t appreciate how important Daniel’s school friends were to him. A wedge between mother and son developed and grew.

When Jill had Amber and Sarah, she invited the girls to help her set the table, make cookies, prepare for parties. As their teacher, she cultivated and celebrated Amber’s love for art and Sarah’s for acting. In the summer together with Daniel, they played in the sand and worked in the garden. Because Jill didn’t miss an opportunity to be involved with her daughters they had a strong attachment for each other. Joseph’s bonds with his daughters weren’t a stressor for her. She had learned to be involved with her children.

To admit you were wrong isn’t easy. To admit that you can see how another person can feel you were wrong is a little easier. It took Jill’s desire to be with her grandchildren to motivate Jill to confess it was reasonable for her son to see her as being selfish. That admission allowed a bridge to be built over the rift that separated her from Daniel.

Is this common sense?

The more quality time parents have with their children the better.

Where have you seen parent’s involvement in the children’s lives paying dividends?

Quality time with your children––a high priority. Joseph, in Baggage Burdens. presents a twist to what is quality time with your children? Look for this in the next blog.

Being D i f f e r e n t !

Being Different

Follow your passion. Be different. What’s the cost?  In Baggage Burdens. Martin Shopka, Uncle Mike and Joseph learn living a lonely life is the cost of being different. Can any passion really be worth it?

Martin Shopka’s loves breeding horses, but what makes him different is that he’s one of two older men who is not married. He is active in the church. He works on the father/son annual campout, but he has few close friends. Being lonely doesn’t bother him. At Daniel’s wedding he challenges the popular opinion among his males friends. He states that Jill, Joseph’s wife, really is a good wife.

Uncle Mike loves farming like that of many families in the Orthodox Community Church. His best friend is Thomas, his hired farm hand. Because Mike is born and raised outside of the church community, he isn’t really a part of the community. The depth of Mike’s loneliness comes to light in Mike’s will. He leaves two thirds of his land to Joseph, his nephew, who visited him on the farm a few times. The remaining third goes to Thomas who cared for Mike after his heart attack.

JOSEPH loves farming and is an excellent carpenter, but he too is an outsider. He is not trusted. Parents closely chaperone their daughters when he is near. Joseph confesses to Jill that his fear is that he’ll die alone like his Uncle Mike. Only when Joseph marries Jill, a girl also outside the religious community, is Joseph accepted in the church fellowship. Then he is a farming family man like the rest of the people.

Being you is not always easy.

At times a person may have to shelf their true nature to be accepted in a group.

What story can you tell to illustrate this situation?

To be a very good parent, is the wish of most parents. Jill’s wish is to be better than her own parents. In the next blog about Baggage Burdens. we’ll see see how Jill tries to achieve this goal?

Jill, a Non-Conformist

Jill,

a Non-Conformist

Why be part of a group if you don’t want to follow its practices and mores? Most people would leave such a group. Marginal interest in a group’s activities leaves a person feeling left out or worse, looked down upon. In Baggage Burdens. Jill some times finds herself in such groups. They aren’t of her choosing. Her failure to conform to their values and behaviors makes her life difficult.

Jill’s first unsatisfactory group is her high school peers. In this party-loving group Jill meets Dave, an attractive acquaintance, and Robin, a close friend. Jill is seen as an odd ball at school because she refuses to attend social functions that permit alcohol. She rejects what her teen-age friends see as normal weekend activities because of her father. His drinking results in violent behavior at home. His belittling accusations and cruel actions embarrasses her. Better to be a non-conformist than an ill-behaved daughter. 

Jill marries Joseph. They move to his home on the farm. At first she’s welcomed into Joseph’s Orthodox Community Church. Jill enrolls in summer school courses to earn her grade twelve diploma. While it is her source of pride, it is the community’s censure. Jill should focus on the traditional woman’s role––care for your husband and your children. Jill starts home schooling her daughter, Amber instead of sending her to the church school. Jill’s position as a community member takes another hit. Her non-conformist actions leave her feeling isolated, especially after the church services.

Can you find fault with a group for wanting little to do with someone who frequently challenges their long established and respected practices? One might expect a church to be more loving. It was. When Jill gave birth to her first two children, she received their enthusiastic support. Sympathetic expressions came quickly when her third child died at birth. Neighbors participated at the birthday parties of her eldest son, Daniel. They pitched in to help build a new work shed for Joseph and an extension to the house when the size of Jill’s family increased. However, when Jill’s actions differed from their expectations, disapproval was expressed.

Be a non-conformists, choose to walk the path less traveled and expect to be alone.

Who do you know who doesn’t really fit in?

How did the host group treat them?

Was it fair?

In Baggage Burdens. Jill is not the only who lived a life that was different from the rest of the church community. The next blog looks at how Uncle Mike, Joseph and Martin Shopka faired in the church Community.

Doing Things My Way

Doing  Things   My Way

A benefit of being a bachelor is that you can do things your way. No spouse or significant other to answer to. That is Martin Shopka’s edge. His freedom to do what he wants is the foundation that unnerves Jill. He is beyond control. His beard and his smoking serve as symptoms of his unrestrained power.

Jill’s father, when he was drinking, was beyond control, was violent. He too had a beard and smoked. Jill transposes her father’s undesirable characteristics to Martin. Her dislike for Martin solidifies.

Martin’s unpleasant attributes belie his true nature, a nature that Jill can’t see. Martin helps organize some of the church’s father-son outings. He asks how Jill is doing when she is in the hospital. At Daniel’s wedding Martin’s smoking friends question whether Jill is a good wife. Martin defends her.

Joseph sees Martin as a good friend. Martin rents land from Joseph for his horses. He invites Joseph and Daniel to ride his horses whenever they want. Martin sells Hoss, a gelding, to Joseph so Joseph’s daughter, Amber, can ride a horse. When Joseph fails to find a buyer for his land, Martin purchases it. Yes, Martin benefits from his business transactions, but so does Joseph

Jill sees Mr. Shopka as a person who doesn’t care what others think of him. Her experience has taught her that such a self-confident person can be harmful to others. Ironically she seeks the same self-assurance. She chooses to further her education while raising a family. Members of her community disapprove. Jill home schools her children causing more friction with her neighbors. Jill doesn’t care.

Ugly is a bearded smoking man. Like beauty, ugly is skin deep. Why Martin made those choices is unknown. Perhaps he wanted to be like other men in his church. Why wasn’t he married? His past wasn’t revealed. Without knowing Martin’s background Jill lets Martin’s surface features dictate her attitude. Like Martin, Jill exhibits some disturbing behaviors. As reader you know about Jill’s childhood. You can be more understanding.

To know the real person takes time and patience.

What story can you tell to show how initial impressions of a person can be misleading?

In Baggage Burdens. Jill ignores Martin Shopka for what she saw as his unacceptable way of living. When Jill fails to follow the conservative lifestyle of the Orthodox Community church, they ignore her. The price of failing to conform with  community mores is the subject of the next blog.