To Be A Very Good Parent

To Be A Very Good Parent

In Baggage Burdens. Jill’s goal was to be a very good parent, at least better than her parents were to her.  A very important thing to know is that a parent is human; a parent will make mistakes, especially first time parents. The key is to learn from those mistakes.

Jill’s first mistake was missing opportunities to be involved in activities and games with her son and her husband. It began when she didn’t join Daniel, her son, and Joseph in sleigh rides to cut down the family Christmas tree. For Jill it was too cold. She found the board games played by Daniel and Joseph too competitive. Daniel loved being Joseph’s gopher in the greenhouse. Jill worked on her correspondent courses. Joseph became “soccer mom” for Daniel. Jill stayed home.

The bond between father and son grew strong. Jill felt left out. To compensate she attempted to convince Daniel to let her home school him as she was doing for Daniel’s sister, Amber. Daniel resisted. Jill’s second mistake, she persisted in attempting to persuade Daniel to change his mind. Jill didn’t appreciate how important Daniel’s school friends were to him. A wedge between mother and son developed and grew.

When Jill had Amber and Sarah, she invited the girls to help her set the table, make cookies, prepare for parties. As their teacher, she cultivated and celebrated Amber’s love for art and Sarah’s for acting. In the summer together with Daniel, they played in the sand and worked in the garden. Because Jill didn’t miss an opportunity to be involved with her daughters they had a strong attachment for each other. Joseph’s bonds with his daughters weren’t a stressor for her. She had learned to be involved with her children.

To admit you were wrong isn’t easy. To admit that you can see how another person can feel you were wrong is a little easier. It took Jill’s desire to be with her grandchildren to motivate Jill to confess it was reasonable for her son to see her as being selfish. That admission allowed a bridge to be built over the rift that separated her from Daniel.

Is this common sense?

The more quality time parents have with their children the better.

Where have you seen parent’s involvement in the children’s lives paying dividends?

Quality time with your children––a high priority. Joseph, in Baggage Burdens. presents a twist to what is quality time with your children? Look for this in the next blog.