Love, Flowing from the Heart
“I’m not a loving person.” In Baggage Burdens. that is the self image that
Jill has of herself. It’s an impression she formed when she was a rebellious
teen. From the time Jill ran away from home to her years as a wife a reader may
conclude Jill is right. She uses or manipulates others for her own benefit.
Bill, a person
who attended the Family Conference in Chicago with Jill, would disagree. He’d
probably say Jill not only has an empathetic ear, she responds in a supportive
way. In the midst of a heavy snowstorm, Jill’s uncharacteristic loving
initiative surprises Joseph, her husband.
in Bill’s prayer here is one of his memories from the
Family Conference.
‘But Jill was so accepting. I told her things I couldn’t even say to myself, I couldn’t even
tell You. I don’t know why I felt I could trust her. But I was right. I told
her that even though Reverend Williams convinced me to go to the conference, I
still felt like an abandoning husband. Jill didn’t see me as a monster. She listened to me, talked with me,
made me feel––’ he pauses, searching for words that described his feeling––‘I
was a good man, a valuable person who had much to offer. What a relief! I could
only conclude she was a gift from you.’
driving home in a heavy snowstorm
 |
“Joseph, what’s wrong?”
Joseph sucks in a long deep breath. In a very low voice he
says, “that radio warning––don’t drive unless you have to.” He falls silent
again. His hand sweeps away another tear creeping out of the corner of his eye.
“That’s like the warning my grandmother told me was issued when my parents
tried to drive home from Grand Prairie. They didn’t heed it. They died.” He
takes another deep breath. “I don’t want that for our children.”
Joseph’s arm shoots out pointing to the motel sign. “I knew
it,” declares Joseph. “There’s a vacancy. Phone Julie. Tell her because of the
roads we won’t be home tonight.”
Jill wonders what she can do distract Joseph from the
sadness brought on by the memory of his parent’s snowstorm death. She remembers
the opening scene of a play previewed for the drama club. A smile crosses her
face.
“You coming?” repeats Joseph. He steps out of the car.
“You want a married woman to spend a night in a motel with
you, right?”
The strange question stops Joseph. He states his affirmative
answer. Turning around he looks at her, trying to figure out what she is up to.
“Do you think it’s wise that the clerk knows who the woman
is that will be sharing your––”
“Whaaat?” says Joseph as he drags himself back into the car.
“Grabs your attention, doesn’t it?” says Jill grinning. “I
just paraphrased part of an opening scene from a play our drama group half
considered.”
“Jill, what does this have to do with anything?” A touch of
annoyance colors Joseph’s response.
“Joseph, I want you to trade scenes, the depressing scene of
your parent’s death for an alluring fantasy, a scene where a guy picks up an
attractive women from a party and brings her to a motel for the night.”
Joseph digests her idea. He can’t believe he sees a playful
smile. He dares to check it out. “A fling?” he ventures.
“With a mystery woman, a once-in-a-life-time opportunity,”
clarifies Jill, grinning as she sees Joseph buying into her option. “A secret
only you and I will know about.”
Are Jill’s loving actions above
a case of a person can’t be all bad or a case of when one is safe loves
flourishes?
a haiku capsule
empathetic
ear
senses
a painful sorrow
divert attention
My next blog shows tolerance is not good enough.
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