Break a Promise?

     

Break a Promise?

My word is my bond.

True   or  False

Can you break a promise? A simple, “yes,” is not what you would expect from a people-person. A critical factor is how will it affect the person who has a certain expectation. In some cases, the effect may be modified by your relationship to that person. How close are you? 

Another affect may be how necessary is it that a promise is broken. If keeping the promise means greater harm for another then forgiveness may be forth coming. Even then the potential harm may be a matter of perspective. 

The decision about whether to break a promise isn’t always given much thought, but the varied results of such an action are shown in the novel, Baggage burdens. Such results indicate breaking a promise needs careful consideration.

Consider the situation where a father is an alcoholic. He promises his daughter, Jill, he will quit drinking time and again. He breaks that promise and comes home. Violence erupts. She runs away from home. How long do you think she will hate her father––5 years? 10 years? 25 years? 

Jill moves in with a former boyfriend after he promised not to try to restart their relationship. He breaks his promise. How long will her resentment last? Is it possible that since the males in her life have “lied” that she will generalize her mistrust to all males, at least not completely trust them? Jill’s life portrays a situation that actually happened. 

Have you ever shared personal thoughts and feelings with a family member and later discovered that that person ended up sharing parts of your private life with someone else in your family? How might that affect your ability to trust anyone, ever? 

Jill’s baggage is that she has experienced all three of these kinds of situations. Her burden for almost thirty years is that she finds it very difficult to trust anyone. Can you blame her? Do the consequences of broken promises make you think twice about not keeping your word?

                   Boyfriend’s Broken Promise

Jill can’t shake Dave’s focused concentration on her when they sat on the stairway steps. He listened so intently when she told him she had to leave home. He knew the truth about her father and her beatings. Then there was his pleading look. He almost begged her to let him help by making the basement suite available for her. He frequently took her side on supper menus, arguing against his brother. 

Dave kissed her in the pantry, shattered her “he-loves-me” impression. His betrayal countered her infant security impression. 

He promised no advances, no personal relationships. How could he do that? He ruined everything.

“And what of his willingness to apologize. Remember your grandmother’s assurance?”

“It’s too late. Damage is done.” 

Haiku capsule:

My word is my bond.

Unbreakable pledge, I thought.

A glass assurance.

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MOTHERS-IN-LAW