A MONSTER at Work

A Monster at Work

Following your passion and being paid for it–– what could be better?  In Baggage burdens. that  was Joseph’s experience. He loved farming. While it didn’t make him rich, he was happy. Joseph enjoyed carpentry too. It supplemented his farming income. For Joseph and his family, Jill, Daniel and young Amber, all was well, like everyone singing around a small campfire on a cool evening.

Then, like dandelion seeds blowing in from the neighbor’s property, dissatisfaction rooted itself into Joseph’s family. Something more was wanted. At first it was a car for Jill, then a Hawaiian holiday, and then a move to the city, to Camrose. Jill’s passion for a house like her grandmother owned flowered in this atmosphere.

 As long as pay cheques can cover costs of the new desires all is well, right? If more desires sprout, then a larger pay cheque will manage new expenses. All that is need is a higher paying job or more hours of work or both. Joseph had utilized all those strategies, only to learn a monster had crept into his life.

His passion for his work changed. His job became a need. His work became a means to a different end. Because he enjoyed carpentry, he accepted the responsibilities that came with becoming a foreman, including extra hours of work. What he hadn’t realized, until it was too late, was that the new work demands had become a monster that gobbled much of his time. It became a monster that turned on him.

The first slashing wound, a call from a vet, caught Joseph at work. The vet recommended that Amber’s horse, Hoss, be put down immediately. Joseph agreed. Work demands prevented Joseph from breaking the news to his daughter. Work was supposed to be the means by which Joseph could make his family happy. His failure to make contacting Amber his first priority convicted him of forgetting that purpose. Work had started eating away at his family relationships.  Amber’s words (below) demonstrate the depth of the monster’s bites.

“Don’t touch me,” warns Amber. She steps back. “You don’t love me. You don’t love anybody. All you care about is your work. Just like Mom says. Money is all that is important to you.” Amber backs up again. “I hate you. I hate you,” she screams. Amber turns and runs up the stairs.

Joseph starts chasing after her, wanting to hold her, to explain, to apologize. He calls out to her. She turns. Her anger forces him to stop. Her pain burns fiery red. The need to spit out poison eats at her. She won’t hear anything he has to say. With the venom out, Joseph hopes healing can start. Unsatisfied he doesn’t catch her, he rationalizes. ‘She’s apt to scream even louder and wake up everyone else. Tomorrow after supper I’ll talk to her.’

As Joseph’s head sinks into his pillow, the echo of Amber’s words burn like a branding iron. I hate you. I hate you. Several minutes pass before the searing pain from those words ease. Just like Mom says. All you care about is your work. The words sting. The impression, ‘I’m a poor father,’ simmers like acid from heartburn, daring him to lie down so it can erupt and scorch a lasting memory. Joseph leans against the wall feeling framed, lacking energy to mount a defense.

Joseph steps into Emily’s room and sees Amber take a deep breath. As Joseph closes the door, he says, “Amber, we need to talk.”

“We already did,” she says standing up to leave.

Joseph bars her escape. “You talked. Now it’s my turn. Please. Sit down.” The tone of Joseph voice convinces Amber she has little choice.

“Amber, I should have called you as soon as I knew the vet wanted to put Hoss to sleep.”

“That’s right. You should have,” says Amber. A trace of anger lines her response.

“I want you to know that my failing to call you had nothing to do with carelessness.”

“I know. Mom told me. Work comes first.”

The comment burns Joseph like a firm slap in the face. He resolves to stick to his plan. Joseph tells Amber about the vet’s emergency call pulling him out of meeting with Mr. Olsen’s suppliers. Then he relates the vet’s diagnosis and recommendation. As he suspects, Amber listens even though the information is several days late. I thought of calling you then, but the vet didn’t want to have to make a return visit to the Weickbergs.

“I’m sorry Amber. Maybe I should have insisted that he come back, but lately life at work has been a major turmoil. I thought I couldn’t handle any more situations.” He held Amber’s attention. “When the vet asked if I wanted to prolong Hoss’ suffering I gave in.” He concludes by asking Amber to forgive him, if not now, then sometime in the future.  He hopes her silence means she’s considering his request.

“One more thing,” he adds. “As for your mom’s opinion that work is the most important thing in my life I want to tell you that she is wrong.”

Amber looks up at him in disbelief.

Joseph feels like he’s just been called a liar.

The monster at work in Joseph’s family is the inability to keep a balance in home and work life.

How often have you seen this happen?

haiku capsule

                                                                            work meetings––a must.

                                                         home––second priority.

family––upset

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