Eyes of Faith

Eyes of Faith

God not seen? Peace not felt?

In the previous blog Jill, the protagonist, in my novel, Baggage burdens. didn’t see God’s caring efforts. Frequently she was anxious. God was with her, always guiding her to members of his caring family. Why was she still stressed?

Jill lacked eyes of faith. Her deficiency begins with her thinking that God doesn’t care about any one’s personal life. It’s compounded by the belief that she is unworthy to be loved. According to her father she is a very disobedient, disrespectful child. Even if God did care about a person’s daily trials, why would she qualify for his attention?

In spite of her nervous tension one can easily say that Jill was really lucky. Jill found landlady Mrs. Maxwell, who provided food and lodging for Jill, a midnight stranger who came knocking at her front door. Luckily Mrs. Robertson reconnected Jill to her loving grandmother. Then Jill finds immediate lodging and employment when she flees from Ontario to Alberta. What are the odds? The problem with relying on Lady Luck is she is fickle, or as Amber, Jill’s daughter once said; Lady Luck is such a bitch. Counting on luck is risky.

Being blessed is an infinitely preferable perspective. Bold statement? Not really, not if one has seen God’s blessing as a frequent occurrence. Writers are often advised to write about familiar experiences. Through the eyes of faith I have seen God’s involvement in my life many times. The result is peace, being content. That doesn’t mean there’s been no challenges or goals to achieve, but it does mean there is a lot less tension.

How can one show the route to God’s peace? A model might help. Bill serves this purpose. He frequently visited Jill during her hospital convalescence. When Jill was to be released, he volunteers to drive her home. Instead, without telling Bill, Jill takes a cab home. Bill’s handling of the disappointment illustrates a person at peace, a person who was content with the time he shared with her. Unfortunately, if one is struggling with unexpected changes as Jill was, the value of his response is easily missed.

Several people, having the eyes of faith, can work with a person struggling to find peace. It works for Jill, but Bill, her mentor, finds it’s no easy calling. It is critical that the peace seeker first perceives their relationship as caring, a caring for her welfare. This approach takes patience, much time and many interactions.

Knowing that Bill serves at the Wellness Center in the evening, Jill calls at a time when she believes Bill is finishing his lunch. She expects a cutting remark when Bill hears her on the line. It’s not his nature, but she feels she deserves it. She’s been home for more than a week, and she hasn’t called him to explain her hospital departure. To her surprise she receives a casual greeting. He politely enquiries about how she is adjusting to home life. His accepting response to her apology surprises her.

Jill admits that she was wrong to leave the hospital instead of waiting for him. No sooner does she begin with “I wasn’t thinking clearly” than Bill stops her.

“No need to explain. I thought you might want some time to adjust being home, to talk with your children.”

Jill’s speechless. He voices one of her excuses. Relief sweeps over her.

Remembering the other reason for her phone call, Jill tells him that she and the children would like him to join them for supper next Sunday. She includes the children in the invitation because she feels that Bill might not want to come if it is only her desire. She can’t fully believe that Bill has no hard feelings about her deserting him. Still certain that Bill will reject her offer she is ready to tell Amber that she tried.

Bill accepts.

           haiku capsule:                 

two peace approaches     

take a chance, find eyes of faith

a confident glow

      Next blog:

Unworthy of Love