Death Arrests

Death

Arrests

One

He has died. She has passed on. He has gone to be with Jesus. It doesn’t matter how you say it. The news has such finality that one must pause. Separation between you and the one you know, the one you love is irreversible.  Depending upon how close you were to the one who is no longer with you, you stop for awhile (hours, days, weeks months) and take account of what is lost. 

No one is perfect. By the same token no one is all bad. Those redeeming qualities of the person who died will no longer be experienced by you. There is no hope that you will delight in that person’s joys. All you have left is memories. 

How long you stop to savour those good memories, how long your life is arrested to recall what you have lost, depends upon how closely you were tied to the deceased.  In some cases, people take a leave of absence from work. Some even quit work. Life’s duties can force a refocus. Still special occasions spent with the now deceased can cause a pause, special times like their birthday or the times you spent making a meal or going to football games. Another one’s death forces one to stop and acknowledge loss.

Death or a sudden loss occurs many times in my novel, Baggage burdens.At times the loss is shocking. Reaction is the first priority. Whatever is happening is set aside as is the case when Joseph’s dog, Butch, died. Even Joseph’s friend, Thomas, quits working on rebuilding the garage to comfort Joseph. 

News that Jill’s mother died is unexpected. The loss forces Jill to hurry away from the friends that she is visiting. Memories of her mother’s love flood back even though Jill had some misgivings about her mother. 

Jill ran away from her loving grandmother. That separation caused Jill grief. She missed her grandmother dearly. She stopped what she was doing and thought of her often. But like a death it was something that she thought was irreversible.

Julie looks at Jill. She reaches out for her aunt’s hand and holds it in hers. “The reason your grandmother hired the detective was to let you know your mother was very ill.” Julie lets the information sink in before continuing. “You see,” she pauses. “Your mother had cancer.”

Jill’s arm jerks back as if a mousetrap snapped. She runs outside through a blur of tears. She barely makes it out to her car. Images of her mother combing her hair as she sat on the stool, her mother telling her how beautiful she looked, her mother rushing Jill off to her room when her intoxicated father destroyed the peace flash by.

Jill envisions the detective’s search as her mother’s voice calling for help, a call she ignored. Blame for abandoning her mother threatens to suck her into the ground like quicksand.

After a moment’s delay, Ann and Julie race after Jill. Once outside, Julie touches Ann’s shoulder, slowing her down. 

“I think the rest of the story I have she should hear in private. It may help calm her down,” says Julie. 

As she approaches Jill, Julie lets her feet scrape the cement pad to announce her arrival. After standing near Jill for a few minutes, listening to her trying to control her sobbing, Julie puts her arm around Jill’s shoulders and holds her. 

“Josey wants you to know that your mother wasn’t alone when she passed away.” 

Jill looks at Julie. 

“Josey and your sister were by her bedside,” continues Julie.

“Kathy?” whispers Jill. She bursts into a fresh flow of tears. I completely forgot about her.

Julie holds Jill in her arms. In a whisper, she continues. “Yes, the detective located her about a month before your mother died.” After a while, Julie adds, “Your father was by her bedside too. He was sober. Josey said he’d been sober for several months. It was hard to believe, she said. He’d quit drinking when he heard about your mother’s illness, almost as if he thought Alice wouldn’t die as long as he stayed away from alcohol. At least that is what Josey thought. When your mom died, he took it very hard. Josey felt sorry for him.”  

Haiku capsule:

Someone special dies

Drop everything. Remember.     

Now–– just memories.

Next Blog: 

Sacrificing––

a Sign of Love